I’d love to be able to say that the overriding motivation for writing today’s recipe had nothing to do with the childish need to make innuendos about my balls.
But this would be a filthy lie.
WARNING!: If you haven’t already realised, Glenn has the mind and humour of an 8 year old. The compulsion to refer to ‘his balls’ may be exhausting for some readers.
We love an innuendo here at Wild Life HQ. In fact, we make innuendos about things that aren’t even remotely rude, suggestive or risqué. All you have to do is add, “so to speak” at the end of any sentence, and voila! – an innuendo.
But anyway, back to my balls, so to speak.
The following recipe is super simple, and one of my favourite nibbles to take out into the hills when I’m walking. Nutrient dense and brimming with energy boosting ingredients, they are perfect to help fuel a long day out in the mountains.
My biggest issue with these bad boys, is the fact that I often eat them all before leaving the carpark and setting foot on the trails.
The ingredients list is minimal and very adaptable. It’s just 6-8 things:
- Protein Powder
- Coconut Oil
- Almond Butter
- Cacao Powder
- Dessicated Coconut
- Chia Seeds, for some extra crunch
- Cinnamon (optional)
I like my chocolate pretty damn bitter, but if you like your balls a bit sweeter you can also add some honey, xylitol, stevia, or sweetener of your choice.
You can, of course, substitute other ingredients, or indeed add extras. Any nut butter would work for these, and the choice of protein powder flavour is entirely up to you. I opted for chocolate, but vanilla works well too.
These protein balls are low carb, cereal free, gluten free, keto friendly, and depending on which protein powder you use, potentially vegan.
Obviously, this all depends on the sort and quality of protein powder you use. Some powders are packed full of sugars, preservatives and fillers, so choose the best quality you are able to afford.
These puppies are pretty damn rich, so a little goes a long way.
You can make these in a blender, but I prefer to use my hands. The heat from my hands helps to soften the coconut oil and make it easier to combine with the other ingredients.
Don’t be tempted to pre melt the coconut oil, as it will end up a gooey mess, just work it in with your fingers.
And depending on which nut butter you use, you may end up with a wetter, more oily mixture or a drier one.
It will feel quite dry and crumbly at first before the oil softens. If it feels too wet and sticky you can add an extra bit of protein powder. If it’s too dry, add a little more coconut oil.
If your balls are getting too hot and sticky whilst you’re rolling them in your hands, you can always pop them in the freezer for a wee while to harden them.
And in case you did a search for coconut oil and balls, and ended up here, all confused, the post you are probably looking for is The Cuddlier Gentleman’s Guide to Chafing.
Chocolate, coconut and chia seed protein balls
- 6 tbsp protein powder (flavour of your choosing)
- 2 tbsp almond butter
- 3 tbsp coconut oil
- 1 tbsp cacao powder
- 1 tbsp desiccated coconut
- 1 tbsp chia seeds
- 1 pinch cinnamon (optional)
- 2 tsp honey, stevia or other sweetener (optional)
- coconut and cacao for dusting your balls
- Add all the ingredients into a bowl
- Start mixing the ingredients with your hands, crumbling the mixture between your fingers.
- As the mixture warms in your hands it should begin to soften and become stickier. If not, you can add a little extra coconut oil. If it's too sticky, add a little more protein powder, or desiccated coconut.
- Once the mixture becomes a tacky lump, divide it into eighths and roll each piece into a ball between your hands.
- Your balls should be nice and sticky at this stage. Now you can roll them in cacao powder or desiccated coconut (or both).
- You can eat them straight away but I prefer to harden them up in the fridge for about 20 minutes.
I keep my balls in the freezer, preferring them to have a little ‘bite’. They will keep there for a good three months, probably more, but mine never last that long.
These balls are packed with lots of nutrient dense and mood boosting loveliness. From the polyphenols and mineral content of cacao, the immune boosting effects of whey protein, to the power house that is chia seeds, my little balls pack a pretty hefty punch.
You can adapt this recipe in any way you like.
If you want more of a fudge like stickiness you can add some medjool dates. If you want more bite, add some oats. If you want more crunch, add some nuts. The imagination is the only limit.
The Chocolate, Coconut and Chia Seed Protein Balls, as they are presented in the recipe, have a macro nutrient breakdown as follows, for those who care:
- 99 calories
- 2.3g of carbs (0.9g of Net carbs)
- 8.8g of fat
- 4.6g of protein
They are a great little sweet treat, and they are quite satiating, I think in part due to the protein and also, the richness.
If my sweet tooth kicks in after dinner, I grab my balls. If I’m heading out for a long run, I grab my balls. Pre or post workout fuel? I grab my balls. They are perfect for every eventuality.
So there you have it. I have presented my balls to the world for all of humanity to appreciate and enjoy.
And if you need a soundtrack for preparing these, you can’t beat Isaac Hayes.
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